What is success? Success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose, whatever you consider to be your aim, and you achieve it, by definition you are successful. But success is more than that, it's what car you drive, it's what your job is, it's how you dress and walk, it's how you are compared to your peers.
Gone of the days where you felt successful for accomplishing something minor for yourself, if you can't brag about it it's not much of an accomplishment. One would argue this is due to the fact that other people's opinions matter more to us than our own.
My favorite example is when you get a test grade back in class; before the paper has hit the desk the person sitting next you is grabbing to see if they did better than you. They are basing their success solely on you, this feeling of being better than you is what is judging their success, irrelevant if you both got an A, if they got the extra mark, they are better than you and they won't let you forget it.
Success is based on where you are on the social ladder, the famous question of "What do you do" when you meet someone. For me, being the grand age of 17, I don't get that question, it's always 'What do you want to do'.
Depending on this answer is if they stay around to find out more or make their excuses to leave. Alain de Botton believed that the reason for this is because we are all snobs. Ordinarily snobbery is associated with rich country folk that tut at the poor boy who delivers their paper every morning, however now we are all becoming snobs. We judge people on a small part of who they are and come to a full conclusion, hence why the "What do you do" question has become so vital in modern society.
We tend to envy those who are of a similar background to ourselves, people we can relate to. We don't envy the Queen because she is simply too far out of our world, yet a school friend; suddenly our success is more based on their success, being that you've had, within reason, equal opportunities.
Gore Vidal comments on this phenomenon with his famous quote "Every time a friend of mine succeeds a small part of me dies". What we consider successful is so pinned on our comparison to our peers.
This is why Jeremy Kyle is so popular; it makes you feel awesome seeing people suffer on your screen, quite disturbingly sadistic if you ask me! But it is this comparison that we thrive and base our happiness on.
I have no remedy of how to start feeling successful for everything you achieve, people will say to you, just ignore what other people think, and however much you might tell your friends that you don't care and your independent, you do, I guarantee it.
I find it fascinating when people strut around saying how little they care about other peoples opinions, the whole 'I'm going to do what makes me happy' rubbish, and then go bright red when you get asked a question in class.
So I suppose the best you can do, is be the best, work hard and achieve what you want to achieve, to be a successful person, takes time, effort and dedication. When you next envy someone for something they've achieved, remind yourself of something you have done better!
It got really deep at the end there, should become a life coach. A little bit on success and how to judge success, kind of linked in with status anxiety. Leading on from this I will stick with the same type of theme and dive into our possessions and if they define who we are, either that or take the political philosophical view of meritocracy.
Thank you very much for reading and please share it with your friends etc. and do whatever you do to get more views! I learned a lot of this from Alain de Botton so go check him out on "TED" or "YouTube" or at "The School of Life!"
Please go visit my blog at http://www.mustoesmind.blogspot.co.uk and have a read of my other posts and if you like please share with other you think may like it.
If anyone has any suggestions on future areas please comment and I will try fit it in somewhere :D
Thank You
Adios
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Alex_Mustoe
No comments:
Post a Comment